|
|
Would you like help with
- What your teen is doing on the internet?
- Communicating with your teen or preteen?
- Parental monitoring?
- Being a good role model?
- Using appropriate and consistent discipline?
- The warning signs of substance abuse?
- Taking a clear stand on drugs, alcohol, and
sexual activity?

Coming to a location near you....PARENT LIFESAVERS!
w o R k S H o p S
For more
information or to schedule an event,
please contact us! |


Parents Prefer Abstinence
Education 2 to 1
Zogby Survey Shows
Dramatic Shift in Attitudes
Once Parents Understand
Differences Between
Abstinence and Comprehensive
Sex Education
Washington, DC — The
National Abstinence
Education Association (NAEA)
today released a new survey
from Zogby International
showing that when parents
become aware of what
abstinence education vs.
comprehensive sex education
actually teaches, support
for abstinence programs
jumps from 40% to 60%, while
support for comprehensive
programs drops from 50% to
30%. This sharp increase in
support of abstinence
education is seen across all
political and economic
groups. As federal and state
lawmakers debate funding for
sex education in public
schools, this new survey
offers a compelling look
into what parents want for
their children.
“These results confirm
broad-based support for
abstinence education,
including teaching teens
about developing healthy
relationships and increasing
self worth and self
control,” said Valerie
Huber, executive director of
the NAEA. “While abstinence
education has been
continually misrepresented
by its opponents, we were
confident that parents would
strongly prefer abstinence
education over so-called
“comprehensive” sex
education after they
received full, accurate
information about this
common sense educational
approach.”
The survey also showed
overwhelming parental
support for how abstinence
programs permit an age
appropriate discussion of
contraception within the
context of promoting
abstinence as the healthiest
choice. In line with the
abstinence education
approach, most parents said
they want their children to
be taught the limitations of
condoms in providing
complete protection against
specific STDs and to learn
how often condoms fail in
preventing pregnancy based
upon typical use. The
majority of parents reject
the so-called
“comprehensive” sex
education approach, which
focuses on promoting and
demonstrating contraceptive
use. Sixty-six percent of
parents think that the
importance of the “wait to
have sex” message ends up
being lost when programs
demonstrate and encourage
the use of contraception.
Key Facts from the
Survey
- 59% of
parents said more
funding should go to
abstinence education;
22% said more should go
to comprehensive sex
education.
- 83% of
parents think it is
important for their
child to wait until they
are married to have sex.
- 78% of
parents think sex
education classes in
public schools should
place more emphasis on
promoting abstinence
than on condom and other
contraceptive use.
- 93% of
parents agree sex
education should include
a discussion about the
limitations of condoms
in preventing specific
STDs.
“This poll confirms that
abstinence education is the
preferred approach for the
sex education of youth in
America,” said Valerie
Huber. Zogby International
conducted a telephone survey
of 1002 parents of children
ages 10-16. The margin of
error was +/- 3.2 percentage
points. Margins of error are
higher in sub-groups. Access
the entire survey from Zogby
International at
www.abstinenceassociation.org.
HHS Report:
“Comprehensive” Sex Education
Ineffective And Offensive
Programs Instruct Teens As Young As 13 on
Sexually Explicit Material
Washington, DC – Parents today learned the truth
about so called “comprehensive” sex education
curricula from a US Department of Health and Human
Services (HHS) study. The government report reveals
how the most commonly used sex education programs
have virtually no effect in keeping teens from
having sex yet contain numerous sexually explicit
lessons taught to teens as young as 13. Of the nine
commonly used curricula studied in
the HHS report, most showed no impact in
preventing teen sex, and one failed to even evaluate
program effectiveness. All the programs reviewed by
the HHS devoted an overwhelming amount of teaching
time to topics such as condom usage, condom
demonstration and sexual game play as methods of
“safe” sex.
“Although they receive ten times the amount of
government money as abstinence programs, so-called
‘comprehensive sex education’ has not been proven to
delay teen sex,” states Valerie Huber, Executive
Director of National Abstinence Education
Association (NAEA). “The predominant message
encourages sexual activity. The message of
abstinence is virtually non-existent.”
The HHS study also revealed some startling
components of the “comprehensive” sex education
programs for teens as young as 13 include lessons
include:
- Advocating showering together as a no risk
activity.
- Promoting methods for sexual stimulation.
- Conducting sexual role-play on how to help a
partner maintain an erection.
- Describing how to eroticize condom use with
a partner.
- Suggesting teens wear shades or a disguises
when shopping for condoms so adults and parents
won’t recognize them.
Parents communicated their strong support for
abstinence education, as currently funded by
Congress, in a recent 2007 Zogby poll. In fact,
regardless of ideological leaning, parents from
across America supported abstinence education over
‘comprehensive’ sex education by a 2:1 margin. The
very topics that parents wanted curricula to cover
are absent in most ‘comprehensive’ sex education.”
FOXNEWS.COM HOME >
HEALTH March 2008
CDC: At Least 1 in 4 Teenage Girls Has
Sexually Transmitted Disease
At least one in
four teenage girls nationwide has a sexually transmitted
disease, or more than 3 million teens, according to the first
study of its kind in this age group.
A virus that causes cervical cancer is by
far the most common sexually transmitted infection in teen girls
aged 14 to 19, while the highest overall prevalence is among
black girls — nearly half the blacks studied had at least one
STD. That rate compared with 20 percent among both whites and
Mexican-American teens, the study from the federal Centers for
Disease Control and Prevention found.
Among girls who admitted ever having sex,
the rate was 40 percent. While some teens define sex as only
intercourse, other types of intimate behavior including oral sex
can spread some infections.
For many, the numbers likely seem
"overwhelming because you're talking about nearly half of the
sexually experienced teens at any one time having evidence of an
STD," said Dr. Margaret Blythe, an adolescent medicine
specialist at Indiana University School of Medicine and head of
the
American Academy of Pediatrics' committee on adolescence.
But the study highlights what many doctors
who treat teens see every day, Blythe said.
Dr. John Douglas, director of the CDC's
division of STD prevention, said the results are the first to
examine the combined national prevalence of common sexually
transmitted diseases among adolescent girls. He said they likely
reflect current prevalence rates.
"High STD rates among young women,
particularly African-American young women, are clear signs that
we must continue developing ways to reach those most at risk,"
Douglas said.
The CDC's Dr. Kevin Fenton said given that
STDs can cause infertility and cervical
cancer in women, "screening, vaccination and other
prevention strategies for sexually active women are among our
highest public health priorities."
The study by CDC researcher Dr. Sara Forhan
is an analysis of nationally representative data on 838 girls
who participated in a 2003-04 government health survey.
The results were prepared for release
Tuesday at a CDC conference in Chicago on preventing sexually
transmitted diseases.
Four common diseases were examined — human
papillomavirus, or HPV, which can cause cervical cancer and
affected 18 percent of girls studied; chlamydia, which affected
4 percent; trichomoniasis, 2.5 percent; and herpes simplex
virus, 2 percent.
Blythe said the results are similar to
previous studies examining rates of those diseases individually.
HPV can cause genital warts but often has no
symptoms. A vaccine targeting several HPV strains recently
became available. Douglas said it likely has not yet had much
impact on HPV prevalence rates in teen girls.
Chlamydia and trichomoniasis can be treated
with antibiotics. The CDC recommends annual chlamydia screening
for all sexually active women under age 25. It also recommends
the three-dose HPV vaccine for girls aged 11-12 years, and
catch-up shots for females aged 13 to 26.
The American Academy of Pediatrics has
similar recommendations.
Douglas said screening tests are underused
in part because many teens don't think they're at risk, but
also, some doctors mistakenly think, "'Sexually transmitted
diseases don't happen to the kinds of patients I see.'"
Blythe said some doctors also are reluctant
to discuss STDs with teen patients or offer screening because of
confidentiality concerns, knowing parents would have to be told
of the results.
The American Academy of Pediatrics supports
confidential teen screening, she said.
Thomas Arnold, Parent Educator says...
Parents...Get Involved!
Research clearly defines parents as the single most influential factor affecting
a teen's sexual decision-making. Parental involvement is more critical today
than ever, as teens become more vulnerable to at-risk behaviors.
By the age of 18:
-
60% of teens will have had sexual intercourse
-
25% of sexually active teens will have contracted an STD
-
20% of girls will have been pregnant
Our parent groups both inform and motivate parents regarding the importance
of abstinence education. Our material and facilitator combine eye-opening,
research-based facts about widespread teen sexual activity and consequences with
clear guidelines for encouraging teens to choose abstinence. We cover 10
specific steps you can take to make a critical difference in your teens’
health and futures by empowering them to choose abstinence until marriage. Help
your whole family talk openly and honestly about relationships, health, and the
benefits of saying
YES to waiting for sex until marriage.
-
TOPICS include…
Be Informed—Things Have Really Changed!
What They Don’t Know Can Kill Them
Mixed Messages Don’t Work
Abstinence Allows for Promising Futures
Be There
Communicating “You Are Special and Significant”
“How Do I Know When I’m in Love?”
Establish Rules and Boundaries
What to Do When Nothing Else Works
A 6-week interactive Group will help you protect your teen’s health and
future, along with encouraging open communication and relationship building.
We can tailor our groups to fit your schedule. Email or call today to
enroll, or to become a group sponsor in your WORKPLACE.
- Talking to your children about sexuality is one of the most important
things you can do as a parent. Many parents feel awkward and embarrassed
when attempting to do such a thing. Teenagers, as well, may feel put on the
spot and embarrassed when their parents bring up the subject. There are
techniques parents can use to limit the amount of awkwardness felt and the
level of embarrassment that surrounds the topic of sexuality.
Here are a few tips that have been proven to work for many parents:
1. The setting matters. Night walks and driving at night are
two of the best ways to get a conversation going with your teen. It doesn’t
involve eye contact. Teenagers usually feel put on the spot when you look
directly at them. You can ease some of that uncomfortable feeling if you
don’t look into their eyes. Your teen will appreciate it, and you might feel
better too. Both you and your teen are not as visible. The darkness of night
puts both you and your teen in shadow, which increases his or her comfort
level, since they feel somewhat hidden.
2. There is an activity going on at the same time. Any lulls in
the conversation will not be as uncomfortable, since you're taking a walk or
traveling in the car. Both of you will be able to bear the silence.
3. Continue talking about sex.
http://abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=4379015 Many parents have “The Talk” or
just put a book about sex on their teen's bedside table for a few weeks.
It’s going to take more than one conversation to get your thoughts across.
Your teen’s attitude about sex will also change as time goes by. The more
you talk about it, the better, and the easier it will get for both of you.
4. Look for teachable moments to bring about discussion about
sexuality. Let today's media work to your advantage. For example, while
watching television, ask your teen what he/she thinks about situations that
involve sex outside of marriage. This is one way to learn more about the
opinions your teen has about sexuality.
If you would like to be involved in a group,
contact our Parent Educator, Thomas
Arnold.

More frequent and more in-depth sex talks may bring parents and
their children closer together.
Parents Not Talking to Kids About Sex
by Steve Jordahl, Correspondent
SUMMARY: Study shows that, though many teens take a vow of abstinence until
marriage, there's more that moms and dads can do. A growing number of teens are
looking to their parents for
information about sex, but many moms and dads are unprepared to have the
conversation, according to a recent NBC poll. The lack of information leaves
those wanting to delay
sexual activity feeling alone.
Eighteen-year-old Rachel Watters said the firm boundaries she and her boyfriend
have set around their physical involvement come from a solid relationship with
her parents.
"My mom and I have a very close relationship -- are very open with each other,"
Watters said. "I'm in a dating relationship now, and I can talk to her about
anything."
Watters is in the minority, though. More than half of the teens who responded to
the survey said they rarely if ever discuss sex with their parents. But Jack
Samad of the National Coalition for the Protection of Children and Families said
he believes those teens would have such conversations if they felt they could.
"What kids would tell you (is) that they would be open to speak to the parents,"
Samad said, "but the parents aren't comfortable and aren't equipped to talk to
them about the issues they want to speak to."
The survey found that almost nine in 10 teens under 16 reported that they had
not had sex - although some have experimented with other forms of physical
intimacy.
Scott Phelps of the Abstinence and Marriage Education Partnership said the
survey confirms that teens respond extremely well to a clearly reasoned,
positive presentation of the benefits of saving sex until marriage.
"Seventy-four percent said that the major reason (they are not sexually active)
was that they made a conscious decision not to have sex or a conscious decision
to wait," Phelps said.
Too few parents, he added, are willing to make the personal sacrifices needed to
correctly model purity. Many parents, for example, won't turn off an
inappropriate TV show that they're watching, and therefore feel hypocritical
trying to restrict their kids' viewing habits.
(This article appeared in CitizenLink Daily Update published
March 28, 2005.)

HPV Get the facts!
http://www.cdc.gov/std/HPV/default.htm
HPV infections common among women who've only had
one partner: study
Jan 13, 2008
TORONTO - When it comes to human papillomavirus infection, it
appears the adage "it only takes one" is right on the mark.
A new study of university students shows that nearly one-third of
women who reported having ever had only one male sexual partner were
infected with an HPV within a year of starting that sexual
relationship.
Three years into those partnerships, nearly 50 per cent of the
women had been infected at least once, despite the fact they'd still
only had a single sexual partner.
"This paper shows that even just with one partner there's a high
risk of infection," lead author Dr. Rachel Winer said from Seattle,
where she teaches at the University of Washington.
"It's unlike other STDs (sexually transmitted diseases) where . .
. the virus or bacteria is in core (population) groups. HPV is
different in that it's just very common among everyone who's having
sex. So even just being exposed to one partner makes you susceptible
to infection."
The study, which was supported by the U.S. National Institutes of
Allergy and Infectious Diseases, will be published this week in the
Journal of Infectious Diseases.
The findings underscore the wisdom of offering HPV vaccine to
girls before they've begun to have sex, said Dr. Monika Naus,
director of the immunization program at the British Columbia Centre
for Disease Control in Vancouver.
"What this confirms is that you shouldn't wait until you've had
one or two partners before you consider HPV vaccine, because there
is a risk even with that first partner," said Naus, who was not
involved in the study.
She noted that data from British Columbia - drawn from a survey
of adolescents and teens - suggests that by age 12, four per cent of
boys and 3.1 per cent of girls have already had sexual intercourse.
By age 16, the rate rises to 28.3 per cent of males and 33.4 per
cent of females.
The HPV vaccine currently on the Canadian market - Merck Frosst's
Gardasil - is licensed for use in females aged nine through 26. The
National Advisory Committee on Immunization recommends it be given
to girls between ages nine through 13, suggesting at this age most
Canadian girls aren't yet sexually active.
Four provinces have rolled out publicly funded HPV vaccine
programs. Newfoundland and Labrador and Prince Edward Island offer
the shots to girls in Grade 6, Nova Scotia to girls in Grade 7 and
Ontario to girls in Grade 8.
In the research, Winer and colleagues were looking at an older
group of subjects - women who waited until they were in university
to begin having sex.
But a previous study in younger British teenagers found
strikingly similar results. The authors of that work followed a
group of female teenagers aged 15 to 19 who had just started their
first sexual relationship. Among those who had still only had one
sexual partner three years later, the HPV infection rate was 46 per
cent.
The new research followed 125 women aged 18 to 22 who hadn't had
sex yet or had had their first intercourse with a single male
partner in the three months prior to the start of the study.
The women were asked to keep Web-based diaries of their sexual
activities and to offer their best guess of how many previous sexual
partners their boyfriend had had. They also had gynecological
examinations every four months.
The researchers stopped collecting data from women in the group
if they reported they had started a sexual relationship with a
second partner.
The fact that some women were newly infected two and even three
years into their first sexual relationship could have been due to a
slacking off in condom use, the authors suggested.
Other factors could have been at play as well. The males could
have had sex with someone else, the women could have had other
partners they didn't report or they could have had sexual contact -
stopping short of intercourse - that allowed transmission to occur.
The rate of infections among women who guessed their boyfriends
had had more than two previous sexual partners was higher than among
women who guessed their partners were less experienced.
"That's one of the strong findings that came out of this work:
That the more partners the woman's male partner had had, the greater
the chance that she got infected with the HPV virus," said Ann
Burchell, a PhD candidate at McGill University whose own work
focuses on sexual transmission of HPV.
Burchell, who wasn't involved in the research, said it also shows
that those who suggest women can avoid HPV infection by having only
one sexual partner in their lifetime aren't taking an important
variable into consideration.
"Telling a women just to have one partner in her whole life and
be monogomous is also not necessarily protective," she said. So even
if a woman waited until marriage and that was the only partner she
ever had, she still may get an HPV infection through that partner."
The reality of human papillomaviruses is that they are out there,
Burchell said.
"The analogy that I've heard about HPV is that it's the common
cold of the STI (sexually transmitted infections) world. If you
leave the house in the winter you're probably going to catch a cold
at one point. And HPV is very much like that."
"If you're sexually active, you're quite likely to get it at at
least one point in your life."
NBC SHOWS SAD REALITY…
KIDS FEEL TRAPPED BY WORLD ADULTS CREATE
In a heart-breaking
special on NBC on Jan. 26th, Katie Couric talked with 20 teens gathered
from around the United States on their attitudes about sexual activity. Two
common threads drew all 20 youth together. One, the overwhelming majority did
not have sexual experience, and two, most felt pressured by society
and individuals to engage in sexual activity. These uniting ties were consistent
with a national poll of 1,000 youth conducted by NBC and People
Magazine in preparation for the show.
Watching teens admit feeling pressured to engage in sexual activity has many
upset.
“Where is the outrage today?” asked Jessemyn Pekari, Communications Director for
the Abstinence Clearinghouse. “These kids admitted that they couldn’t get away
from sex….that it is everywhere and they feel they are becoming
desensitized to it. This show was a desperate cry for help. Is anybody
listening?”
Janet Jackson, Desperate Housewives, MTV, and more are pushing dangerous
behavior on an entire generation of teens and so few in the media seem to care.
Even NBC, in their quest to “understand” teenage sexual activity, promoted it by
showing graphic sexual videos to the teens during their time with Katie Couric.
Abstinence educators understand the real world facing teens today. Unlike
others, they believe in empowering teens to feel good about waiting until
marriage to engage in sexual activity.
“Teens feel forced to grow up. Our culture is pressuring them into sexual
activity for which they are neither physically, emotionally, or financially
prepared to handle,” said Leslee Unruh, president of the Abstinence
Clearinghouse. “It’s time for adults to behave like adults and to make our
culture a safe place for kids to live.”
Upton Sinclair, in his book The Jungle, wrote about child labor, and in so
doing, challenged the entire world to rethink how children were treated during
the time of the Industrial Revolution. It’s time for another revolution on
behalf of children…A Cultural Revolution. Abstinence educators have begun the
battle…who will join the fight? Will you?
The Abstinence Clearinghouse is a non-profit national educational organization
that promotes the appreciation for and practice of sexual abstinence through
distribution of age-appropriate, factual and medically-accurate materials. The
Clearinghouse was founded to provide a central location where character,
relationship and abstinence programs, curricula, speakers, and materials could
be accessed. The Clearinghouse serves agencies on a national, state and local
level, as well as international organizations.
(copied in part from www.abstinence.net)
____________________________________________________
Parents
Overwhelmingly Prefer Their Kids Be Taught Abstinence

A new poll shows moms and dads strongly oppose condom-based sex education
Colorado Springs, Colo.—The vast majority of American parents want their
children's sex education classes to emphasize abstinence until marriage,
according to a new poll released today.
The survey, conducted by Zogby International for Focus on the Family, also found
that parents strongly oppose the values and messages of comprehensive sex
education, a training model that assumes teens will become sexually active and,
therefore, must be given easy access to condoms.
In fact, a significant majority of those surveyed believe that sexual behavior
is likely to lead to psychological, emotional and physical problems for teens.
"This poll illustrates that the people most concerned about the health and
emotional well-being of America's children -- their moms and dads -- recognize
that abstinence is the only surefire way to protect their kids," said Linda
Klepacki, manager of the abstinence department at Focus on the Family. "As hard
as the comprehensive sex-education lobby has tried to sell its 'safe-sex'
message, it's clear parents aren't buying it."
Klepacki announced the poll results at a Washington, D.C., news conference
today, an event also attended by Dr. Wade Horn, assistant secretary for children
and families at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
“It is gratifying to learn that parents agree with the President that the
primary message we should give our children when it comes to sexual behavior is
abstinence until marriage,” Dr. Horn said.
The survey of 1,008 parents of children under 17 featured in-depth questions
about the respondents' views of teenage sexual behavior, the messages contained
in sex education curricula and sexual activity as it pertains to human
relationships. Among its highlights were:
• Sixty-eight percent of parents want schools to teach teens that individuals
who remain abstinent until marriage have the best chances of marital stability
and happiness. “Abstinence programs," Klepacki said, "support this theme while
comprehensive sex ed classes seldom mention marriage and do not criticize casual
sex."
• Ninety-one percent want their children to be taught that sex should be linked
to the type of love and commitment found in marriage. “Abstinence programs are
built upon this message while comprehensive programs present sex as a physical
process," Klepacki explained. "The highest aim for comprehensive programs is the
avoidance of STDs and unwanted pregnancy. Abstinence programs aim teens toward
an enriched life.”
• More than 56 percent said that information about contraception should either
not be taught as a subject or taught in a class separate from abstinence, such
as a health or biology class.
• Only 39.9 percent thought that abstinence and contraception should be combined
in a single class. But even on that matter, only 2 percent thought that sex
education should focus on teaching teens how to use condoms. "That is a shocking
number," Klepacki said, "because the vast proportion of government programs in
the past had as their goal getting more teens to use more condoms. It is clear
that the public health establishment has been out of step with the will of
America’s parents. Only with the current administration has funding been
dedicated to abstinence.”
The Heritage Foundation confirmed that conclusion in an analysis of the Zogby
report released at today's news conference. The report noted that $4.50 was
spent on comprehensive sex education for every $1 spent on abstinence education.
Senator Sam Brownback also participated in the press conference. Brownback said,
“As we work to reauthorize abstinence education in Congress this year, and in
light of President Bush’s increased focus on the issue, we should take a good
look at the data presented today. It is clear from this study that most parents
want their children to be taught in different ways and that includes increased
attention to abstinence education.”
More information is available at www.citizenlink.org. Polling results are
available at www.whatparentsthink.org.
(For more information, contact David Gasak at (719) 548-4570 or culturalissues@family.org.)
What type parent are YOU?
Every parent manages his or her relationship with children differently. Research
has found that some strategies, or styles, are more effective than others. What
is a “parenting style?” A parenting style refers to the manner in which parents
treat, communicate with, discipline, and support their children. It encompasses
both how the parent responds to the child, and how and what the parent expects
from the child.
Here are four major categories for parenting styles, with general results for
the well-being of the children:
Authoritative/Affirmative: these parents set clear limits and enforce
limits and consequences. An authoritative parent is engaged, caring, and
devoted. There is an emotional connection with expectations.
In general, these children tend to thrive, being successful both academically
and socially.
Liberal/Permissive: these are loving parents who set fewer limits. They
often want to be seen as “friend” and believe in letting children make their own
mistakes, but don’t follow through to help children learn from and correct
mistakes.
In general, these children succeed academically and socially, but are more
inclined to be involved in drugs, alcohol and sex.
Dominating/Authoritarian: These parents tend to set strong rules, they
are strict, and often lack compassion. Thy have a tendency to micromanage, and
to allow adolescents to make very few of their own decisions.
In general, these children succeed academically and socially and tend to stay
away from drugs, alcohol and sex. They are often, however, unhappy and
emotionally troubled.
Unengaged: These parents provide no nurturing and set no limits.
Children are unsuccessful socially and academically and are often involved in
drugs, alcohol and sex.
Research supports the theory that the Authoritative parenting style is most
closely related to happy, well-adjusted adolescences who avoid risky behaviors.
Parents who are supportive and caring, while also monitoring behavior and
enforcing boundaries, have teens who tend to be more successful in school and
have better emotional, psychological and physical health.
In addition, several family factors are shown to affect the well-being of
children. Positive parent-child relationships, for example, are extremely
important for the well-being of the child. Teens who have caring, involved and
satisfying relationships with their parents are more likely to be academically
successful, socially well-adapted and to avoid risky behaviors. Teens often feel
insecure and need to experience physical and emotional connection with their
parents. Even if they ignore their parents, they want them around.
Modeling is also an important factor. Teens whose parents have positive and
healthy behaviors are more likely to engage in those behaviors themselves.
Parental awareness and monitoring of their child’s behavior has also been shown
to positively affect a child’s welfare. Parents who know their children’s
friends and activities, and who set age-appropriate limits have teens with lower
rates of risky behaviors.
(taken in part from www.talktothem.org) |
|
Teens who use alcohol are seven times more likely to be sexually active, putting
them at a greater risk for STDs.(The National Center on Addiction and Substance
Abuse (CASA)
23% (5.6 million) of sexually active teens and young adults ages 15-24 in the
United States report having had unprotected sex because they were drinking or
using drugs at the time. Twenty-four percent of teens ages 15-17 say that their
alcohol and drug use led them to do more sexually than they had planned. (The
Henry J. Kaiser Family Foundation and The National Center on Addiction and
Substance Abuse at Columbia University)
|
Did you know?
- 95% of adults and teens thought it was “very” or
“somewhat” important to give teens an abstinence message through
high school. (National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, 2002
survey)
- 87% of parents said that teens should be at least age 16
before they begin steady, one-on-one dating. (National Campaign to
Prevent Teen Pregnancy, 2002 survey)
- 54% of teens surveyed in Crockett, Obion, Lauderdale, and
Dyer Counties have not have sex! (Right Choices of West TN, 2003
survey)
|
Parental Influence on Teen Sex
What influences teens to have sex? There are many factors, including
sexually explicit messages in the media, peer pressure, alcohol, and
drugs. However, parents also play a major role in whether or not their
teen will have sex. In a 2001 poll, 49 percent of teenagers said their
parents influenced their decisions about sex most strongly. Parents
affect teens' sexual decision-making by their marital status, attitudes,
supervision, and involvement in their children's lives. A 2000 study of
national data found that adolescents living with both of their parents
were less likely to engage in sexual activity than those living with
single parents. Also, a 1994 study found that teens living in a
single-parent home at age 14 were more likely to engage in sexual
activity and to have sexual intercourse more frequently.
Parental attitudes toward sex also greatly affect teen sexual behavior.
A 1996 study of black adolescents ages 14 to 17 revealed that those who
believed their mothers disapproved of adolescent sexual behavior either
abstained from sex or had sexual intercourse less frequently. The
authors of the study emphasized that "parents need to be firm in their
emphasis on abstinence if they wish to discourage their teenage son or
daughter from engaging in sexual intercourse." The Adolescent Health
Study also confirmed the importance of maternal disapproval of sex.
Among 8th-11th graders, "when teens perceive that their mother strongly
disapproves of them having sex, they are more likely to delay initial
sexual intercourse."
Parental supervision and emotional connectedness between parents and
teens play a big role in whether or not teens engage in sexual activity.
A 1994 study found that teens living in neighborhoods where most parents
work full time and provide less supervision were more likely to have
sex. Studies have also confirmed the importance of parent-child
connectedness. A 1997 longitudinal health study of 12,000 adolescents
found that teens were more likely to delay intercourse when they felt
emotionally connected to their parents and when their parents
disapproved of their being sexually active or of using contraception.
The Adolescent Health Study also found that "high levels of mother-child
connectedness are independently related to delays in first sexual
intercourse among 8th and 9th grade boys and girls and among 10th and
11th grade boys."
|
|
In our busy lives today, it is hard to keep up with everything going on
in the world. When it comes to sensitive subjects such as sex, some
parents feel more confident in a discussion if they have information.
Right Choices provides "parent groups" for parents and other adults
interested in improving communication with teenagers regarding sexuality
and making healthy choices for their lives. The Big Talk Book
by Bruce Cook forms the basis for the curriculum and discussions. There
are various written exercises in the text that are used in the group
times with the goal to increase dialog between parents in the class and
their teenagers.
Did you know....
59% of teens consider their parents to be role models of healthy,
responsible relationships. (National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, Sept.
2003 survey)
45% of teens say that parents are the most influential about their
decisions about sex - more than any other area of influence. (National Campaign
to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, Sept. 2003 survey)
|

88% of teens say it would be easier for teens to postpone sexual activity if
they were able to have more open, honest conversations about these
topics with
their parents.
(National Campaign to Avoid Teen Pregnancy, Sept. 2003 survey)

Right Choices of West Tennessee has a library of videos, books, brochures, and other support materials that you may check-out for personal use. We are available to talk with you if you need assistance in communicating with your teen, or teens with whom you have a sphere of influence. We strive to identify and implement effective strategies that offer abstinence education resources to parents and guardians.
|
What About Pornography?
Viewing pornography can be very dangerous to a person's mind. In
fact, many serial killers, such as Ted Bundy, confess that pornography fueled
their violent behavior. It is true that this does not happen to most people, but
obviously it happens to some, and pornography does create subtle dangers worth
considering.
In his book, The Centerfold Syndrome, psychologist Gary R Brooks, PhD identifies
five symptoms that he describes as “pervasive disorder “ linked to consumption
of soft-core pornography like Playboy and Penthouse.
The following concentrates on males because internet research shows that (Sean
Kaldor, vice –president of ecommerce for online researchers Nielsen/ NetRatings)
the top five sites for women are shopping sites, while the top 5 for men, using
the exact same criteria, are adult sites that offer free pornographic photos.
Voyeurism – an obsession with looking at women rather than
interacting with them. Brooks says that the glorification and objection of
women’s bodies promotes unreal images of women, distorts physical reality,
creates on obsession with visual stimulation and trivializes all other mature
features of a healthy relationship.
Objectification – An attitude which women are objects rated by
size, shape and harmony of body parts. Brooks says that if a man spends most of
his emotional energy on sexual fantasies about inaccessible people, he
frequently will not be available for even the most intimate emotional and sexual
moments with this partner.
Validation – The need to validate masculinity through beautiful
women. According to Brooks, the women who meet centerfold standards only retain
their power as long as they retain perfect bodies and their leverage of mystery
and unavailability. And the great majority of men who never come close to sex
with their dream women are felt feeling cheated or unmanly.
Trophyism – The idea that beautiful women are collectibles who
show the world who a man is. Brooks says that the women’s-bodies-as-trophies
mentality, damaging enough in adolescence, becomes more destructive in
adulthood. Furthermore, trophies, once they are won, are supposed to become the
property of the winner, a permanent physical symbol of accomplishment and
worthiness. This should not be so with women’s bodies.
Fear of true intimacy – Inability to relate to women in an
honest and intimate way despite deep loneliness. Pornography pays scant
attention to men’s needs for sensuality and intimacy while exalting their sexual
needs. Thus, some men develop a pre-occupation with sexuality, which powerfully
handicaps their capacity for emotionally intimate relationships with men and
women for nonsexual relationships.
Some other things to think about:
Professors Dolf Zillman of Indiana University and Jennings Bryant of the
University of Houston found that repeated exposure to pornography results in
decreased satisfaction with one’s sexual partner, with the partner’s sexuality,
with the partner’s sexual curiosity, a decrease in the value of faithfulness and
a major increase in the importance of sex without attachment.
A study conducted by Dr. Reo Christensen of Miami University in Oxford, Ohio
found that pornography leaves the impression with its viewers that sex has no
relationship to privacy, that it is unrelated to love, the commitment of
marriage, that bizarre forms of sex are the most gratifying, that sex with
animals has an especially desirable flavor, and that irresponsible sex has no
adverse consequences.
According to the book, Media, Children, and the Family: Social Scientific,
Psychodynamic, and Clinical Prospectives, research has shown that sexual
arousal and accompanying excitedness diminish with repeated exposure to sexual
scenes.
In addition, in a series of studies, researchers observed numerous persistent
changes in perceptions concerning sexuality and sexual behavior after repeated
exposure (six 1-hour weekly session) with volunteers to pornography. These
include the trivialization of rape as a criminal offence; exaggerated
perceptions of the prevalence of most sexual practices, increased disregard for
female sexuality and concerns, dissatisfaction with sexual relationships and
diminished caring for trust in intimate partners.
In the book, Men Confront Pornography, Michael S Kimmel maintains that
pornography is one of the major sources of sexual information that young males
have about sexuality and therefore the central mechanism by which their
sexuality has been constructed. “Men can no longer hide behind pornography as
harmless fun.”
The National Council on Sexual Addiction Compulsivity estimates that 6-8% of
Americans are sexual addicts. (article copied in part
from the Heritage Community Services.)
Hey Parents, here are
some things that you may need to DO!

Banning all access to the Internet is one solution. Unfortunately, this approach
carries with it a huge educational disadvantage; the Internet today is the
greatest single educational reference resource available. More information, from
more sources, is available here than in any library in the world.
Personally supervising all Internet access is another solution. This is great,
if you have the time.
Switch ISP providers to one that only offers filtered Internet.
Check with your Internet Service Provider and Browser for any controls already
on offer.
Use child friendly Search Engines like "Yahooligans" or "Ask Jeeves Kids".
Don't assume all child friendly search engines to be 100% safe. There have been
instances of some advertising porn sites. So take an active role in your
children's Internet searches.
Regularly check the History folder on your Browser as it contains a list of
recently visited sites. It is easy to accidentally stumble across pornography,
especially as many porn sites use innocent words in their addresses (e.g.
Whitehouse and Barbie, etc.) So don't jump to conclusions if the History folder
lists a porn site. If you discover sites that have been accidentally opened,
delete the address from the history folder.
Unwanted Email or SPAM, is a very popular with online porn companies. They can
be very difficult to filter out so it's a good idea to check the email inbox and
deleting it before surfing the Internet with you children. Never reply to
unsolicited Emails or unsubscribe from receiving further emails, as these
actions will only confirm that the email address is in use.
Super Highway Safety Site Advice for schools on Internet safety from the
Department for Education and Skills.
Childnet International Key safety issues and how best to discuss Internet safety
with children.
Get Net Wise Challenge yourself and learn how your children can use the Internet
Safely.
About: Internet safety Take the tutorial for Internet safety.
McAfee.com Kids - For Grown Ups US site with level headed information.
Be Safe Online This site has been developed to make adults more aware of how to
use the Internet safely, so they can encourage safe behavior online among
children and young people.
Kidsmart A safety site with resources and activities for families and teachers
including some interactive games.
BrowserLock Acts as a personal Internet portal, providing access to a 'white
list' of approved web sites. The system administrator can add new sites as
required and allocate them to individuals for all.
Keep your kids safe A new site with product reports and information about what
software you need to have installed on your computer to keep your family safe
online.
copied in part from XXXChurch)

For more information on pornography and your teen, please
email
or call Right Choices today.
|